Tuesday, 22 March 2011


after a confusing month i'm now indeed more confused than i used to be. but the only thing i can think is that if something is meant to happen it will. and i'm back to thinking that everything happens for a reason. I just don't always understand the reason. It would be so much better if this thing was simple and if the answers were here now, i wouldn't have to go to sleep at night wondering what might be. But it's impossible and making the best of the situation is hard especially when you don't know what someone is thinking and feeling. The only thing i can think and keep thinking is what will be will be, and everyone has a life planned out for them. its just sometimes, at times, its hard to accept that the life that is planned for you might not be the life that you want at that moment in time. but the life that is planned for you is the one you are meant to have. and when you look back at what you wanted thats when you realise why it hasn't happened, you just have to power through to see if what you want is what you'll end up getting. which looking at that has confused me. in other words there is a reason for everything.
the way I look at it is,
you have a life planned for you
sometimes you want something different
its hard to accept it
when you don't get what you want but the life that's planned you realise that the thing you wanted wasn't that great after all.

still, i just have to power through this crappy situation.

Monday, 21 March 2011

new post

I understand that i am totally rubbish having not posted for a month, but here i am posting again. much has happened, i have now had two dates with Bambi, ( a name to be explained another time) and he is indeed one amazing chappy, not to mention a total hottie. and if he's reading this right now he'll now its true as i told him this last night. though it is a major suck fest i will now not see him till May. it makes me very sad in my face. So i'm now sat watching scrubs, missing him muchly, again if you do read this, you'll know i am actually crazy and do miss you.